Build your influence step by step
Expand your influence, step by step
5 minutes
The Staircase to Influence is a practical, evidence-based framework adapted from the FBI’s Behavioural Change Stairway Model. It outlines the five progressive stages needed to build genuine influence with others: Active Listening, Empathy, Rapport, Trust and Influence.
Instead of jumping straight into persuading or asking for buy-in, the staircase shows that influence is built step by step through understanding and connection. Each stage strengthens the next, creating a clear pathway:
You listen → you understand → you connect → you build trust → and only then can you influence effectively.
The staircase applies to everyday workplace interactions over time from conversations with peers and leaders, to stakeholder alignment, conflict, negotiation and change. It helps you navigate disagreement, strengthen relationships and influence outcomes where both the goal and the relationship are maintained.
In short, the Staircase to Influence explains what influence really is: a relational process built through deliberate steps, not a single moment of persuasion.
When you map your stakeholders against the staircase, you can see where each relationship currently sits – and what actions can move them from listening, to understanding, to trust, and ultimately, to influence.
Most attempts to influence fail not because the idea is wrong, but because people try to skip the staircase – pushing for buy-in before listening, moving to problem-solving before empathy, or expecting agreement before a trusted relationship is established.
The Staircase to Influence matters because it:
- Reduces resistance: people engage more openly when they feel heard and acknowledged.
- Strengthens relationships: rapport and trust make conversations smoother and more productive.
- Leads to better outcomes: influence feels natural and mutual, not forced or imposed.
Using the staircase helps leaders and teams create alignment, reduce conflict and move conversations forward with confidence and respect.
Evidence across negotiation research and social psychology supports the staircase sequence:
Rapport increases willingness to collaborate
A 2021 study of airline cabin crew found that rapport-building behaviours (being attentive, courteous, connecting, sharing information) increased empathy between colleagues, which in turn improved team performance and cooperation.
Trust speeds up agreement and improves follow-through
High-trust relationships lead to stronger alignment, reduced conflict and more effective decision-making (Lencioni, 2002; Cialdini, 2016).
Influence grows from connection. People are more willing to act, agree or change behaviour when they trust the person, feel respected and experience relational connection.
Together, the research reinforces that influence emerges from a sequence of relational steps, not a single conversation or technique.
Use the influence-mapping exercise to create your Influence Map and determine where each stakeholder currently sits – then plan the steps needed to move them from listening to trust and, ultimately, to influence.
